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I may have unwittingly ruined an 18 year relationship.

We used to be so close. We would be together almost every day. He helped me get through adolescence, car trips, waiting rooms. He was always there for me. He is still there for me, but now I’m the one who is being distant. I try to pretend like everything is still the same, even though I know it is not. It can never be the same. Not now that I have her.

She is everything that he was not. She is beautiful, colorful, fun to be with, sociable, and so cute. All my friends love her.

Since I’ve gotten older, he has become a kind of embarrassment. A dirty little secret that I was somewhat ashamed of. He never did change with the times. He was stuck in the 80’s. Out of touch with my twenty-something self, who openly embraced the 90’s (and then the 00’s) as my own. He refused to change. He slowly lost touch with what was cool. And because of that, we have grown apart.

And she is just so fun to be with in bed. It’s been even more interesting since my wife found one for herself, too. Sometimes, the two of them play together and let us join in.

Hers is pink.

And now, my vintage 1989 Game Boy sits on the back of the toilet. Forgotten. A relic of an age now passed.

We bought our first Nintendo DS in October, as an anniversary gift to each other. I was also hoping to get my wife into video games. It worked. By the time Christmas rolled around, I couldn’t pry it out of her hands long enough to play a few rounds of Tetris. So we bought another one. Or rather, we bought a pink one for her, and I claimed rights to our red and black one as my own.

I have been really impressed with the DS. The games are really quite fun and the touch screen makes the control of most games quite intuitive. It has a great battery life, and the wifi works really well.

My wife and I love playing Tetris against each other. Wirelessly. Using only one game cartridge. Take that, Game Boy. I play Rummy, Darts, and Bowling over the Internet with my DS, while my wife plays Frisbee with her Nintendog, Charlie.

It’s like we’ve joined a world of pre-teen geekism. All over again. But with color screens and better graphics.

Don’t get me wrong. I still occasionally play with my old buddy. During a particularly egregious bowel movement, for example.

I don’t want her to see me like that.

And as far as confessing all of this publicly on the Internet, I fairly certain it will never get back to him.

He doesn’t have Internet capabilities like she does.


This is my “Blog”

If you aren't completely appalled, then you aren't paying attention.

This Month on Tacofish

March 2008
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Public Discourse

The Humans in the Wa… on Detached
Jonathan Woolbright on Preparing For War
Jonathan Woolbright on Amateur Hour
Jonathan Woolbright on Suicide in the Morning
Craig on Unfaithful